A row of towering steel silos stands in the center of our little town.
They’re remnants of another era, when dry land wheat farming was a major industry here and farmers would truck their harvests to town.
They’re empty now. The paint is peeling, the metal is rusting, and vultures like to sit on top and glare down at main street.
It’s poetic, in a haunting sort of way, I guess.
Sometimes I get so used to seeing the silos that I don’t see them at all—at least not until a customer at the soda fountain points them out and asks about them.
It’s easy to go blind to the things we see every day, even something as substantial as a steel tower. Everyday things weave themselves into the background of our lives until we no longer realize they’re actually there, even though they certainly are.
And once you start noticing this very human tendency towards blindness, you realize it’s not just about grain bins.
Because it’s not just our town that has silos.
Every town does. Every suburb. Every city.
This whole country is full of them, in fact.
But they’re not the grain-storing kind—they’re the mental kind. The ideological kind. The kind we build online and in our friend groups and in our churches and on our newsfeeds.
And instead of quietly emptying, these silos are getting taller, thicker, and louder.
Strangely enough, people can’t seem to see them, even though we’re living inside them.
I notice it the most when I try to talk about it online, like when I posted this a while back:
I thought it was a pretty benign, “kumbaya” sort of post… but the internet disagreed. What felt like a simple sentiment about togetherness to me looked like WAR to them.
Half of the comments said, “That’s fine, but NOT when it comes to people on the Left. Those people are dangerous. They’re destroying America and must be stopped.”
The other half said, “That’s fine, but NOT when it comes to people on the Right. Those people are dangerous. They’re destroying America and must be stopped.”
Sigh. Different jerseys. Same script.
But I’m not judging, because I, too, once lived in a silo.
Back then, I thought my silo was the greatest thing since sliced bread. It was strong and comforting and filled with people exactly like me. I loved the deliciousness of us vs. them. We KNEW we were right. We KNEW our cause was important. We KNEW better than to ask questions (because we already had the answers, of course). And we KNEW the other side was degenerate, evil, and must.be.stopped.
It was perfect, until it wasn’t. Until the day I ventured outside of my silo, and suddenly I realized my echo chamber wasn’t as special as I thought.
And now, after many years of untangling myself from siloed thinking, I choose to be silo-less.
Because of that, I now have the strange, uncomfortable privilege of dancing between the silos. I talk to some people here and some people there. I ask questions and listen to their stories. I see the passion in the eyes of both sides.
And my biggest takeaway?
They are shockingly the SAME.
Now, they do NOT like to hear that. In fact, it makes them furious.
“No, no, no! My side is correct! My side is saving America!” they say.
But once you strip away the branding, it’s the same arguments, the same justifications, the same “othering.”
Two sides of the same coin.
It’s fascinating. And it makes me realize living in a silo is mostly fruitless, even though, from the inside, it feels like you’re single-handedly saving the world.
So how do we exit the silos?
I’ve sat with that question for years.
I keep coming back to this: we have to notice the stories we’re being sold.
One of the biggest construction crews building these silos is our modern media ecosystem. And whenever I say that, people also get very angry. (Pretty much everything I say makes people angry, I guess…)
“You have to watch the news!” they say. “If you don’t, you’re not informed!”
But the reality is that so much of their precious “news” is scripted—on both sides. Both sides are selling you a story. Both sides profit when you’re convinced that alllll people on the other team want you gone. And before long, you’re repeating the same lines as the people you claim to despise—just with different colors on your team jersey.
Because that’s what so much of this is: a story. A narrative. A product. A revenue-producing machine.
They NEED us in our silos for their clickbait and shock strategies to work.
I could swap the words “Left” and “Right” in most of the comments I see online and no one would notice. It’s the same posture, the same fear, the same certainty that “those other people” are the problem.
It’s the division that’s dangerous.
And who is benefitting from all this chaos? It’s certainly not you. Or your neighbor.
So what do we do?
We fight back—but not with pitchforks and placards.
We fight back by listening. Which sounds soft and squishy, but actually feels a lot like resistance in 2026. True resistance. Resistance to the Machine as a whole—not just resistance to your opposing side.
We fight back by sitting at tables with people we don’t agree with and actually talking to them. Looking at their eyeballs. Asking real questions instead of loading our next argument.
We fight back by reading across the spectrum—not just the one outlet that tells us we’re right and everyone else is evil. We look for the people who are wrestling with ideas in the messy middle, not shouting from the extremes.
We fight back by making friends outside of our prescribed groups, outside our algorithms and favorite hashtags.
It’s easy to hang out only with people who think/feel/believe exactly like you. It’s safe. It’s comfortable.
But it turns us into sad, siloed hermits with a skewed perception of the world.
Which leads me to my other confession… the people who stay in their silos forever? I find them rather boring. You already know what they’ll say before they say it. Their stances, talking points, jabs, and jokes are premeditated and prescribed. It’s groupthink at its finest, and it feels numb and flat.
My most favorite people are the ones brave enough to stand in the middle of the road. The ones bold enough to ask their own questions. The ones adventurous enough to have thoughts of their own without the backup of a safe, warm silo full of people exactly like them.
The ones who can step outside their party line, their denomination, their club, and say, “Hold on… is this actually true? Does this still make sense?”
Those people light me up.
So no, I’m not saying silo-less living will be easy. It’s harder, for sure.
People are messy. Conversations get awkward. You will say the wrong thing. They will say the wrong thing.
But I am saying it’s worth it.
And it might just be the antidote we’re looking for. That is, if we actually want an antidote.
Because in the end, the answer isn’t Left. Or Right. Or higher, stronger silos.
The answer is very ordinary: talking to your neighbor. Bringing someone soup. Going to the school board meeting. Sitting around a table where the only algorithm is whoever happens to live within a 10-mile radius of you. In other words, the answer is stubbornly choosing to stay human.
That is how we start to chip away at the silos. That is how we resist.
So yes, the silos will always be there, looming at the edges of town.
But we don’t have to live in them.
– Jill
P.S. Inevitably, when I talk about this online, someone attempts to drops the mic with, “Well, I can’t have a conversation with someone who wants to hurt me.”
And sure—if someone literally wants to harm you, don’t have supper with them.
But I’d gently challenge that this, too, is mostly a media-fed story. In real life, most of the people you’ve been told would love to see you wiped off the map don’t actually feel that way—especially when they’re sitting eyeball-to-eyeball with you.
That line is just another thought-terminating cliché we’ve been sold to keep us in our silos. I dare you to question it.
This is a brilliant essay, Jill — and so very true. I lost a friend I’d had for many decades–and whom I thought was more mature–when I politely asked her to stop sending me political memes. And I almost can’t give a dinner party anymore, because the vegans don’t want to be in the same room with “flesh foods.” Other friends bicker over whether we should all be on statins for our cholesterol, or whether the danger of cholesterol is a myth driven by Big Pharma. And no one is tentative and questioning about their stances: they all believe their viewpoints are a slam-dunk. I love your recommendation to sit eyeball to eyeball with those who hold differing views, and to ask questions instead of just lock-and-loading your next assertion. Since my own sister is one of those with whom I have to practice this kind of “hold your fire” conversational openness, it’s really important. May the holidays be a time for all of us to take a deep breath, let go of self-righteousness, and step into a more receptive frame of mind. Thank you, Jill!
Absolutely agree! We all want basically the same things, but see it through different lenses. Find the rose colored glasses and share ? Positivity and acceptance of each other is so healing.
Yes!!!
Good Open Perspective. Thank you for your Transparency.
So beautifully said. Keep up your writing!
Thank you Jill. I have been reading your website for many years, learning, listening. I am 83 years old, and you are never too old to learn. Can I add, that it is a lot of work to search out the truth of any subject, but worth the effort. Samuel Clemens said, “a lie will be half-way around the world, before the truth gets out the door.” My thought is that it is that we love a thrill, but the danger is when we let it consume us.
Thank you Jill, you are so on target with this post. We must all Remember united we stand, divided we fall. The controllers are doing a great job of this while people waste their time bickering over things that do not matter. i would ask another question, would you rather be “right” or happy? when we use this daily for everything, life becomes much more clear and simple.
Beautifully written and I agree! Living outside a silo isa bit rough. But as a midwife I care for many types of people. I have added co-care to support more varieties everyone needs love and compassion especially in pregnancy.
Thought provoking article! Nicely done. Thanks
I love this! My family has been so divided on a couple of issues and I have found everything you said to be sooo true! Thank you for saying it anyway and risking the wrath of so many. May I be as brave as you and learn to walk more between the silos.
Thank you!! Thank you so much for actually thinking…rational thinking. Thank you for being a real human, not just a media fed shell. Reading this gave me hope that humanity will come back to its senses at some point. We all just want to be loved, feel accepted, and feel we have purpose in life.
Thank you so much for this, Jill. It encourages me, especially when I think the silos around me are impenetrable and ossified. Even, and especially, those that I’ve built and reinforced for years.
Wow!!!! Spot on! I lived that way many years. It was safe and yes very unchallenging!!! As a Follower of Jesus, I feel more and more the need to listen and mingle with people that are different than me. How will we ever make an impact living in our safe zone. Beautifully written Thankyou for sharing!!!
Wow. This is almost word for word the conclusion I have drawn here as we round out the year. I want to begin the new year with intention, not a side. With open eyes. Thank you for never being afraid to share your heart!
Jill, it is not often that I feel compelled to comment on anything online for the very reasons you wrote about. Thank you for your bravery to see the silos and share. You have created a place for those of us who feel the same to gather and know we are not alone.
I agree with your observations on the news media and the narrow viewpoints of many people. I have friends and relatives on both sides and I look only for what we have in common when engaging with them. They are too precious to me to do otherwise. When I saw the title of your post, I thought ” Yay, silos!” I don’t live on a farm and never have, but I love seeing a silo. While your post ventured off from the my literal view of a silo, I still love them. Seeing them brings me some kind of peace, why I don’t know. I don’t like to imagine a day when they disappear from the face of the earth, like they never were. I’m 80, so thankfully that probably won’t happen in my lifetime. And for the remainder of my years, I’ll continue to choose not to live in one.
Thanks
This is fabulous! I opened my eyes to the division tactics 7 or 8 years ago and have not been on either side since. It has been truly fascinating to see the otherness and wonder how others don’t see it. It’s because they are in their silo’s and are blinded by those metal walls, brilliant! I loved your confession of being bored with these talking points, it is so obviously implanted to people’s brains. People who have true inquisitive thought, light me up as well. Thank you for this wonderful piece!
This is so needed. Thank you for being a bridge builder! I aspire to have the influence to build my own bridges someday.
Yes! We don’t have to agree on everything and we don’t have to be angry. I love the way the Lord is working through me, extending grace and civility towards others. Preach it Sister!
Yes. Thank you.
I love it here, outside the silos. Not everyone likes me but I do. Thank you for saying it so well.
I have been outside the silos for quite a few years now. It feels a lot better on one hand, but can be lonely too. Excellent post Jill!
Well said Jill! Certainly something for us all to consider!
I totally agree that it’s good for people to listen to and understand others, to interact with people who disagree with them, and to work together with the people they disagree with on things where there is common ground.
However, I would argue that it’s also good to have a community of people who share common values and have a common sense of how things should be done. There’s no actual reason such groups have to be angry or intolerant: we are a social creature and we need supportive/comforting space as well as challenging/learning space. I would suggest that it shouldn’t be seen as a question of one or the other, but as a matter of balance. (And of, as you say, trying to get rid of the unhealthy click-bait narratives).
Paradoxically, I have come to think that it’s actually the lack of healthy agreement and life support from others with a shared idea of the good that causes a lot of intolerance. My perception would be that people with a genuine comfort zone and the opportunity to relax in it as well as come out of it, often greatly enjoy contact with and learning about people who think in different ways.
It’s not good to never leave your house nor to have no shelter. I think it would be better to advocate balance.
This is brilliant. I absolutely love your perspective.