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If you’ve read this blog for any amount of time, then you know I am a lover of all things frugal. I am also a very detail-oriented person with perfectionist tendencies…
What do you get when you combine those traits? The potential for an annoyingly-ultra-frugal-crazy-person. (Just ask my hubby) 😉
When I first started my journey as full-time homemaker and stay-at-home-mom, I was obsessed with frugality. It absolutely fascinated me, because for the first time in my life, I actually had the time to put some effort into managing my home. We had been followers of Dave Ramsey ever since we first got married, and I was ecstatic that I could finally stay home and work towards saving money.
I read every book and blog I could find on the topic, and happily dove into the world of pinching pennies and saving money everywhere I could.
Fast forward to almost 3 years later. Am I still a lover of frugality? Yup.
Do I still take daily measures to pinch pennies and “Waste Not, Want Not”? Yup.
Do I obsess over frugality as much as I did at the beginning of my journey? Not so much…
I guess you could say that I’ve “mellowed” out a bit as I’ve matured in my role as homemaker. I still absolutely believe that we are called to be good stewards of what we are given. However, I’ve also come to the realization that it’s possible for frugality to overtake and control your life. And that’s not a good thing.
Today I want to share six warning signs to watch for if you think that frugality has the potential to control your own life. These are the points that I double check personally to make sure that my frugal practices are rational and reasonable.
Six Warning Signs of Over-Frugality:
1. When you sacrifice your time
Many aspects of being frugal take a bit of extra time, and that’s perfectly fine. In fact, that is often considered one of the benefits of “simpler living.” It’s okay to slow down and be more intentional about our actions.
But sometimes our frugal practices can monopolize our schedules and when that happens, it’s time to reevaluate. When your kiddos are begging you to come play and you repeatedly tell them no because you are standing at the sink washing a mountain of Ziploc baggies, it might be time to rethink priorities. (That’s a silly example, but you get what I mean…)
2. When you sacrifice your sanity
By themselves, most frugal practices are fairly simple. There is nothing horribly complicated about reusing baggies, hanging laundry outside, making homemade laundry soap or or cooking from scratch. However, when you combine all of those little duties, it’s very possible to become overwhelmed. Last summer was rough for me. I had an insane number of irons in the fire and could barely keep up with my gardening, the watering, the animals, summer activities, kitchen tasks and our homestead projects. I became incredibly stressed out and quit enjoying my so-called “simple life.”
When you get to that point, something’s gotta give. After some urging from my hubby and sister, I went into “survival mode” and gave myself a break. I purchased a few more “expensive” items at the grocery store that I generally made from scratch (Yes, I even bought a few packages of bread and tortillas…), simplified our meals, and might have even thrown away a Ziploc baggie or two. Scandalous, I know.
But, I survived and happily went back to my normal frugal practices once the crazy season was over.
Don’t let frugal living become an idol in that you will drive yourself crazy by trying to do it all. It’s not worth it.
3. When you sacrifice buying quality goods
Sometimes after we’ve stressed over balancing that monthly budget, it’s easy to grab the cheapest version of the item that we are looking for at the store. But sometimes, this can actually end up costing more in the long run. For example: Back in the day, I prided myself on always buying the cheapest kitchen tools I could find. Why pay more for the “exact” same item, I always reasoned.
My theory seemed sound until the items kept breaking and I found myself continually repurchasing things. I’ve learned that it is much wiser to make small investments in quality items that will last a lifetime, instead of only a few months. It keeps more items out of the landfill, and more money in your pocket, even though it “hurts” more at first.
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All those cheapo non-stick skillets I bought back then have long since been trashed because of scratching, rusting, and warping. (Not to mention they aren’t healthy to cook with…) But my cast iron/stoneware pans and skillets still look brand new, and they are something that I can eventually pass down to my children.
4. When you sacrifice your health/nutrition
This is another area where I’ve drastically changed my views. I used to love going grocery shopping to see how much I could put in my cart for the littlest amount of money. Those lovely packages of ramen noodles? Heck yeah! They were only 28 cents each. And I always stocked up on margarine– after all, you can’t beat 88 cents a pound for the stuff.
Oh my, how times have changed! I now realized that it is vital that we invest in our health by making good choices of what we put in our mouths. While you might be saving a few pennies by purchasing cheap “food” (I use that term loosely…), we will most assuredly be paying for it later in our lives through medical bills for our sick bodies.
This is the main reason I don’t clip coupons. While the savings you can gain from coupons are very, very appealing to my frugal nature, most of the items that coupons are available for aren’t food. (I know, I know– there are occasional organic coupons out there. But the majority of the coupons are not like that. Please don’t yell at me for not liking coupons.) 😉
I now purchase much more “expensive” food items, but I know that I’m investing in my family’s long-term health, and that is totally worth it to me.
5. When you sacrifice giving
Not gonna lie, during the times when our budget has been tighter than normal, I’ve glanced at the money we give to our church and charities and thought, “Man, it sure would be nice to put that money somewhere else and just “pause” our giving for a little while…”
My advice? Don’t do it.
That’s one thing I love about Dave Ramsey’s book, Total Money Makeover. Even though he is a huge advocate of do-whatever-it-takes-to-get-out-of-debt living, he encourage folks to set aside money in their monthly budget for giving to others each month.
All I can say is that God has never left us hanging when we have faithfully given, even though it totally went against my frugal nature at times. You might not be able to give much, but do give something.
I guess the biggest thing I’ve learned about frugality is BALANCE. It’s a wonderful thing, as long as you keep it in check, make it work for you, and don’t become a slave to it.
So, I want to hear your thoughts- have you experienced this “struggle” with frugality that I have? Any tips you can share?
I will post what I did on Facebook:
I think attempts at being frugal can cost you more in the long run (if you don’t do your homework or are new at the concept), but generally, you can only be too frugal when it’s so extreme you’ve become obsessive and has become such a focus in your life that it takes away from more important priorities. For example: my parents were so frugal they would serve my leftover birthday cake on my brother’s birthday (the next day). That’s too frugal on so many levels.
Like this ALOT Jill!!! A whole, whole, LOT!!! Such wisdom!
I agree that balance is the key. Frugality should be the tool that helps you make choices that are important and meaningful, not an end to itself. I, too, do not do couponing because generally the coupons are not for things we normally buy, and if they are things we buy — I can get them about as inexpensively at Costco or Aldi’s, and I do not want to spend my time strategizing coupons and sales and points and such.
Yes, it also seems to me that coupons take a good chunk of time to research and prepare. Plus, we live 35 miles from town, so I can’t easily run here and there before they expire!
Excellent post, Jill! In my almost 12 years of marriage, I’ve come to some of the same conclusions. Especially those that take time away from being able to have some family time in the evenings after dinner. I also keep a few items on hand for convenience when things get too busy, and I don’t beat myself up about it, either.
Nice, Jill! I think we all need to hear this!
The strongest stand out for me is when I’m too “busy” to enjoy family life. I also agree with the couponing. I’ve recently taken a break from it. It takes a lot of time but whole I love the thrill of saving I am finding I prefer to put better stuff in my body. It’s not a whOle lot more expensive but can take more time to prepare. I bake large and freeze to combat this.
I think your level of frugal should depend on where you are in your life. For awhile I did the whole coupon/stockpile thing and it worked out great until I became allergic to most of it. Now that’s not an option but making the most of every other resource and exploring other options to save is still a daily goal. I think the key is to keep it fun. It shouldn’t ever be a matter of life and death but more one of exploration and knowledge of self and resources. At the end of the day you’re doing it for you and your family, if being your current level of frugal gets in the way of that then it’s time for a change…other than that, you’re good.
AWESOME post! I have been following your blog for awhile and am in love 🙂 I was raised on a farm, but now live in a small town. Someday, we’ll be in the country again. I had to become much more frugal after my husband lost his job and then took a job that pays considerably less. I cannot believe how much money we were wasting before, but I justified it because I didn’t think I had time to frugal. Now, I’m busier than ever with two young children and a full-time job. I want there to be time for the most important things, my husband and children, so I try to “sneak” some frugal activities in here and there. I think the lack of shopping has created more time for DIY projects and cooking from scratch. I also don’t use coupons for food. Most coupons are for heavily processed food items, which we don’t eat. Instead, I try to keep a well-stocked pantry and freezer and then shop for fill in items.
Thanks Jenny. 🙂 I agree, less shopping equals more DIY! We live 40 miles from town, so I don’t shop very much… But it’s been great for teaching me how to be more creative, too.
I get your posts via e-mail so I rarely comment, but I just had to this time. I LOVED this post!!! People are sometimes so over the top that I just have to look away and rather than me wanting to embrace what they’re doing (which is what they want), I back off and think they’re nuts. First of all, you seem very non-judgmental which is fabulous, but also you just seem to rational and have a “been there, done that” attitude with what works and what doesn’t. Thanks for sharing that info and for the record, I’m not too much of a “couponer” either just for the reason you said. Thanks mucho!!
Hi Beth! So happy that you decided to come over the leave a comment today! 🙂 I’ve also been “turned” off by people who come across as “overly zealous”… I know that’s not their intention, but sometimes it’s just hard to swallow… It’s all about the balance!
Thank you so much for your balance and wisdom.
I came across your site via Pinterest, and love the perspective you have. We, too, have learned a great deal from Dave Ramsey and have practiced his debt-free living for the past 11 years. I laughed at the image in your post of washing out zip lock bags – I did that when I was first married and the peanut butter was the worst!! I remember the first time I bought paper towel, thinking how extravagant I was. Even though that was over 40 years ago, I still pause when buying something that’s “convenient” to consider if it really contributes to the balance you so beautifully write about. I have a very strict grocery budget, and like you, I do not use coupons, except for something like toothpaste. Clipping and organizing coupons took up valuable time (both at home and in the store!) and led me to buy things I wouldn’t normally buy. Thanks so much for your thoughts and tips. I looks forward to reading more.
Oh yes, I totally toss the peanut butter bags now! HA! And I agree, the balance between “convenient” and “frugal” is a delicate one. It’s easy to tip it too much either way… Sometime I’ll probably be working on for a while. 🙂 So happy that you stopped by.
Very timely post as I work on my (probably overscaled) garden and try to plan for the summer with two kids on an (IMO) overlong Summer break. Keeping it real is definitely something to keep in mind!
Oh Deb, I know all too well about the overscaled garden… It’s so hard not to go overboard at the beginning, ha!
Hi. I bounced over from CheekyBumsBlog and really enjoyed this blog. My hubby and I have coordinated 3 Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University classes so far and really find it to be a balanced and enjoyable way to live and give. I like your thoughts on balance in your frugality. Good deal! I think I will look around your blog some more. 🙂
That’s awesome! We love Dave Ramsey around here. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by!
This is a great post, especially for those of us who tend to be a little obsessive. When we built our house, we moved in without a functioning toilet. Our plan was to use the outhouse and camp toilet until we could finish the bathroom. I remember feeling guilty over wanting a finished bathroom (i.e. working toilet) because “so many people in the world had so much less.” It was only when I realized that our bathroom situation was hindering our hospitality that I changed my mindset. Now I see that there is nothing wrong with wanting a working toilet. Frugal living can be very demanding, rewarding also, but can actually distract from what is most important, and for me that is relationships (family first and then others).
YES Heather! What a great example! It absolutely can be a distraction from the important stuff when it gets out of control. (And I agree, there is nothing wrong with wishing for a working toilet) 😉
Let me say, first, how much I love your blog. Keep giving us very healthy food for thought. The underlying basis for “Frugal Living”, I believe, is “Wisdom”. The underlying basis for “Spending or Charging just because you can” is Foolishness”. I would rather be wise today and still have my needs met for many tomorrows, than to be Foolish today and do without tomorrow. God loves wisdom and dislikes Foolishness. I have decided, I will not eat “out” the entire month of March, because I need to use that money in other, more important, places. When I sacrifice my wants and wishes for my true needs, I am really being good to myself in more ways than financially.
Wow, great thoughts Diane! Good things to think about and remember. 🙂
I think we’re sisters separated at birth. Except for the whole thing about you growing green things and me killing green things. Yeah, just that part.
Well, I’ve killed more than my share of green things, and continue to do so, ha! I recently murdered a lovely windowsill rosemary plant… Hubby ask me “Why did you kill that? I really liked that one…” LOL, sorry honey, couldn’t help it! 🙂
I killed a marigold. I’m not sure you can beat that. LOL
Oh Stacy- you crack me up!!
Love just finding your site. We’re Dave Ramsey – ites too. 🙂
Isn’t he the greatest?! 🙂 Back when we first started reading his books, no one even knew who he was, and now he is a household name. I love it!
I think this is a great list. For me, if it stops being fun/and becomes a chore, that’s when I have to step back and take a break!!! As long as I’m doing good 80% of the time, then I’m okay 🙂 🙂 Love and hugs from the ocean shores of California, Heather 😉
With food and cookware (among other things), it’s hard sometimes to balance the short term costs versus the long term benefit. Eating healthy is SOMETIMES not the cheapest way to fill your grocery cart, but if you look at the potentially saved medical bills down the road….! As with your nonstick pans. Balancing the short term savings versus the long term savings is critical. Enjoy your blog–thanks!
Yes, well said Ellen! I know I spend more on some food items now than I did before, but I feel good about doing that b/c I know it’s providing my family with the nutrients we need. For example, keeping a milk cow is MUCH more expensive than buying $3/gallon store milk, but I don’t mind since I know the fresh milk from our cow is so much healthier for us. Thanks for commenting. 🙂
This is a great post and I’m glad I”m not the only one who doesn’t find that much value in coupons. I’ve found it’s easier to cut down on my grocery bill by growing my own produce, canning and freezing it, and meal planning. I can’t believe how much easier my life and budget has been w/ the simplicity of meal planning.
I smiled at your cast iron picture and reference. I only cook w/ cast iron or my stoneware for homemade bread and pizza. I just did an entire post about cast iron, how to care for it, etc. and had a representative of DuPont(teflon) comment.
Balance is so important.
Yes, I love my cast iron. SO worth the investment! And I agree- my “healthy” isn’t as expensive as it could be since we grow a lot of our own food. That helps a lot!
Thanks for sharing your take on frugality. I think balance is key and that ‘balance’ may be different for everyone. While we all like to think of ourselves as ‘wonder-woman’, it helps to focus, set priorities and take little bites…and most importantly, don’t forget to enjoy life!
YES! Enjoying life is key. 🙂 I honestly forget to do that sometimes… !
Right on!!!! Love this all…. the health and giving parts especially!
We recently spent time in a home where #3 was a BIG problem. She would buy measuring cups from the dollar store, which promptly broke the first time they were used. She probably buys a new set each month! And instead of investing in serving utensils – of any quality – those same measuring cups were used to scoop out food/soup from the pot to the dish. She also purchased their “silverware” from the dollar store, but only enough to keep on hand for a single meal. And there were only large spoons, no smaller ones for the children. This translated to toddlers with half of their food dripping down their face and onto their clothes, which equals less food and more laundry. She thought she was being frugal, but was in reality very wasteful.
One of my large investments many years ago was the purchase of Tupperware (the real deal). It has saved me the expense of a lot of zip-lock baggies 🙂
Yep, that is exactly what I was talking about. 🙂 It’s very easy to be deceived by the dollar store. I used to think that it was the greatest place EVER, but have since figured out that it’s not worth it to buy much of anything there…
And your example also illustrates other thoughts I’ve had- it’s ok to “splurge” sometimes on things that make life easier (i.e. a full set of silverware!) I used to have those tendencies, too, of “I’ll just make it work”… but in the long run, the hassle, time, and expense is NOT worth it… 😉
Great post! I’ll admit that my biggest pet peeve among some frugal/couponing people is that fact that they are buying not so good food because it is free or cheap. That’s not something I am willing to do. I’ve gone through many seasons- where I make all of our bread products and some where I just have to by the healthiest options. Saving sanity is big,
OMG. I can’t believe this. I am the OCD/Frugal freak. I do so many of these things -although thankfully, not all of them. My ex DIL would always tell my son that she could tell wehn I had been in their house because of the washed,foil,saran wrap and baggies that were drying in the dishrack. My kids were the only ones who had to bring home their used wax paper and brown lunch bags…after all they had been only used once. Yes. I would iron out the wrinkles in hopes no one would notice. Raised by imigrant GM, this is what I learned. She did pretty good though – bought her last house with one of my aunts when she was in her 80’s. Love your blog and will sign up. Thanks. Dolores
This is a fantastic post! I know people who do this and in some cases are not actually frugal. They pinch pennies in some ways (won’t buy quality meat) but then buy gallons of soda at drive thrus because they were “thirsty”. I am putting this on my personal and little blog’s FB pages. I am so glad to find your site! Twitter is great for that sort of thing!
I’m glad to find you, too Melissa! Thanks for sharing this post. 🙂
Wow, I love this post! I’ve run into some of these same problems myself. #4 is the biggest one for me – I try not to do this, but with my family, it is difficult.
This whole post reminds me of one of my favorite food-quotes, from Prince Charles. He said, “Fast food may appear to be cheap food and, in the literal sense it often is, but that is because huge social and environmental costs are being excluded from the calculations.”
The dollar menu will cost you WAY more than a dollar down the road… thanks for your great blog!
Love that Prince Charles quote- too bad that many of the leaders in the USA don’t think that way… and I can totally relate- I still struggle with #4 sometimes… 🙂
I’m excited to find your site! I agree with so many of your words here. I think frugality, couponing, real foods, and even homemaking can become idols when they take over our hearts and minds. You’ve hit the nail on the head. (Cannot wait to read the whey article that I see in the margin. I have STACKS of the stuff sitting around. ;))
Excellent points! My sister and I were just talking about this yesterday! I am over from the Homemaking link up.
there definitely needs to be a balance. .. I have to admit I do coupon but Im not out chasing every single deal out there. it has come in handy when hubby couldnt find work..everyone had food in their bellies and tp for their backside, lol
being frugal also frees up money for some splurges…like our recent $100 trip to the circus. we took a friend of my son’s(he’s 13) that has never been before and it was worth every penny to watch him eat popcorn, cotton candy, and enjoy the show 🙂
Yup, there is nothing wrong with couponing- some coupons are great deals. Unfortunately in my area, the pickins are slim. 😉 And being able to splurge once in a while is wonderful and important!
I’ll never forget a Tightwad Gazette’s story I read many years ago about one mama who spent countless hours separating single rolls of 2-ply tissue into two separate rolls of 1-ply tissue. In her mind, this was getting two rolls for the price of one. But in reality, her doing this saved neither toilet paper nor money and just consumed a lot of precious time. Yes, we must be wise and balanced in our efforts to be frugal and exercise good stewardship. Thanks for the good reminder.
I think I’ve read that same story– and yes, that is exactly what I’m talkin’ about! 😉 We can’t forget that our time is valuable, too!
Yes! There IS a difference between being cheap and being frugal. 🙂
Amen to that sister! I told my husband recently that I was worn out. I feel so tired sometimes. I have learned what is important enough to dedicate the time to. But, my priorities still get out of whack and I need to turn myself around again.
When my first few children were little I used to have a silly rule. Ready to hear it? My motive was well meant, my children should never have a bite of food that was NOT homemade food pass their lips. Yup, I tried to do myself in. :o) We live and learn and readjust. :o) Thanks for your blog! It made me smile.
I completely agree with this post! I was a COUPON QUEEN and then two years ago I stopped. I still use coupons when I have them for organics, buy items on sale at my co-op and in bulk with my “natural friends” to save money. I make my cleaners, my son bakes bread, buy whole chickens and make stock, etc, etc. but it doesn’t take half as much time and preparation as couponing and the whole mindset game of doing it did! I feel so much better knowing I buy majority of my food local, butter, milk, eggs, cheese and farmer’s market for veggies and fruit throughout the entire season. My major tip which I learned last year, check your insurance perks, most offer money towards health, like a gym membership, ours would not touch our gym fees with our family so I never used it…but I learned it could be used towards a CSA! Community Supported Agriculture which we paid $275 last year for a half share which was plenty of veggies and fruit for us for a week from June-end of October and after our insurance perk, it was $75 out of pocket! THAT is free food for the summer! I gave a lot of it to neighbors and local store owners as a thank you for their discounts and perks. Shared with our “canning lady” who in turn made some great items for us. It was a fabulous sense of community and a GREAT savings for us! I highly recommend to everyone to join and the cut off for most is in May, so there is still time! 🙂
Frugality: Shopping and living as if the earth, your sanity, art, love, peace, stillness, people and social justice matters.
Cheapness: Shopping and living as if only money matters.
I think frugality invites generosity, compassion and hope.
I think cheapness invites fear, limitation, and despair.
PS- coupons are stupid
I love this post! I’m one of the few frugal people that doesn’t cut out coupons, either.
As for buying good quality kitchen products, I could not agree more. I think it’s fine and wonderful if someone wants to wait to find a good quality item at a thrift store or garage sale, but I can’t count the times people have emailed me asking me to take less on an item in my vintage kitchenwares shop because they could buy a “brand new!!!” one for less. Uh, buy a good one and you won’t be buying again. Buy the cheap new one and you’ll regret it almost every time.
I made the same Teflon pan mistake back in the day. No longer.
I am sooo glad to find your post. It explains exactly how I feel. My husband always thought I could do better in saving if I utilized coupons and sales. We grow much of our meat, eggs & veggies and have friends who will call if there is a surplus of anything in their gardens. We get paid once a month so many years ago got used to buying in bulk so we buy 50# of flour, sugar, etc. and try to make the basics (bread, muffins, cookies, rolls…). I have going to have my husband read through this whole article to show him that I might not be doing that badly. : ) Thanks and keep up the good work!
Thanks, good article. I completely agree with you about coupons. I was all set to start a new life of couponing, but discovered there aren’t coupons for things I actually eat (veggies, fruit, bulk beans and grains, balsamic vinegar, herbs and spices, natural nut butters). I’ll pass on 50 cents off a box of sugary fluff cereal and connective-tissue hot dogs, thanks.
Yes frugal living takes time! I stopped worrying about saving every little penny and decided that some conveniences were worth it if I could get them on sale! For our turkey dinner I didn’t slave over the stove all day! I put the turkey in the roasting pan and let it cook overnight. I know that we are not told to do this because of germs etc etc but you know what? That was the BEST turkey I ever had! It was moist and delicious and cooked through and through and I am still alive to talk about it! This year I took my kids shopping and let them pick out what they wanted instead of guessing and running around several stores! I didn’t make home made cookies I bought store ones. We decided to have Pizza and salads on Christmas Eve and just enjoy each others company! Sometimes you have to forgo things in order to not become obsessive and try to save every little penny! I don’t feel tired but I also saved time and money!
I used to use coupons, but like other have said, most of the stuff i normally buy, doesn’t have a coupon.
If you find your biggest expenses, and try to find ways of reducing their costs, start there. After that becomes second nature, continue to add. Many times, doing the frugal takes less time, than the effor to go buy it.
I also make games of many things. Clothespins. I try to see how many years I could go without buying more. The same with towels. After they get a hole, they became wahclothes, then cleaning rags, then the disposable cleaning rag (for yukky messes).
Dollar stores are filled with crap from China. Unless you need something for a one time dispoable use, don’t bother. Buying secondhand is better, than something new anyways.
I agree- I used to thing that stuff at the Dollar Store was such a steal, but now I know better… I much prefer to buy quality items that are used!
This is really good advice. I am trying to be frugal too and my husband and I like homesteading and prepping for whatever may come our way. While I don’t belong to a church and tithe weekly/monthly, I do give to CBN and a local childrens hospital monthly. Giving is a good idea if you can do it. If you are blessed than you should definitely bless someone else 🙂
Yes how true! I found that my “simple life” was not so simple! I had to give up some stuff I thought was saving me money in order to keep me sane! I discovered a few things like sometimes I could get a better deal on convenience foods rather than making from scratch. I know sounds insane right? But I have a gas stove and the cost to run it these days is enormous so one a week I trade in my make from scratch to bring it home already done! I save some money and keep my sanity intact! We currently have 7 chickens but I think this is my last batch. The price of feed has gone up dramatically. While many profess to get free eggs from the chickens raised in the back yard this is a myth. I spend quite a bit of money on food and bedding. Not really a money saver. Also I don’t clip coupons. What I see is a lot of coupons for junk food something my family and I don’t need. Instead I shop the sales and stay within my budget. I really didn’t see the savings coming from coupon clipping. These are just a few of the things I am doing in order to simplify my life even more!
I used to save $70 a week from couponing. Then I noticed the prices going up and the only way to get a decent price was to use the coupons doubled. But I shop a whole lot differently now. I shop at Sprouts, a natural foods store, Costco, Grocery Outlet and Smart & Final. I have a “best price” list to show where I buy each item and what my target price is for most items. I try not to pay more than $1/pound for produce; $2-3pound for beef or chicken; $3/ pound for cheese, etc… I also stock up when I find a good buy, especially a manager’s special. I have looked at the coupon flyers, but I don’t see anything I want to buy with them. Besides, I would forget, since this is not my habit anymore. I think we eat better now.
I also find it hard to shop with a conscience and stay in budget. I try to stick with fair trade and American made as much as I can. I agree with investing in good stuff, rather than saving money on an item that will need to be replaced too soon.
There is a difference between frugal and cheap. You are being cheap when someone else is paying for your frugalness.
Yes- I hear ya! I shop much differently now, too. 🙂
I identified mostly with the one about getting too caught up int he minutiae of being frugal; hours spent doing a task b/c you feel you must! like insisting on growing my own potatoes when they are a very labor intensive task for a woman in her 60’s, and my daughter can get organic 50# bags from where she works…with a discount! Or, standing at the sink trying to clean EVERY seed from the winter squash…each time we eat one! Bone broth is worth all the hours put into it, but saving thousands of squash seeds isn’t. Now I save a few from each one. Hard to set those limits on yourself though when you’re in the midst of daily life.
sadly… i do relate to this story 🙁
I too was a couponer, an EXTREME COUPONER!, and i have had to re evaluate the real cost of saving money over our health. I still use coupons for things like razors, toilet paper, paper towels and ziploc bags, i also subscribe to recieve organic coupons, but realistically… the coupon items have died down and the grocery bill shot up!
I too have animals, goats for milk, chickens for eggs, and a couple calves for beef. I also have a huge garden that takes up more time and energy than i can comfortably handle all alone. Kids are grown, hubby and i retired… another reason we are frugal, we dont work and cant put back what we spend like a younger Still working Family can.
I totally agree that we have to prioritize our lives especially in light of the fact that we have one of the hardest lifestyles to maintain “that of a homesteader.” There are a ton of chores and responsibilities, not just free eggs and milk and meat.
SO.. YES I RELATE, I AGREE, I EMPATHIZE, AND I WHOLLY CONCUR! WE CAN AND SHOULD LEARN TO NOT BE SO FRUGAL WE TURN INTO ZOMBIES AND FORGET TO ENJOY ALL GOD HAS BLESSED US WITH 😉
Great post! I think I’ve wrestled with every one of those points over the years. It’s easy to get so caught up in “what” you’re doing that you forget “why” and it becomes obsessive. My family has paid the price for my stressing over things. I’ve tried the coupon thing and found it was just better for all of us if I just cooked from scratch with healthy basic ingredients I get from Aldi, Costco and gardening. We feel better and it gives us some good family favorite recipes to enjoy.
I think a turning point for me was to focus on “why” I was I doing this or that. I like being generous and having things to share. Being frugal challenges my creativity and helps me to give better gifts than we technically can afford. Making good memories for my kids by making their favorite cake (from scratch) and ice cream hits the mark on love, but doesn’t break the bank like buying one. That just works for us. I probably pour more energy into “fun” frugal entertainment now than I ever have. It’s good for everyone (including me)!
All of the scenarios (for the most part) mentioned in your post I have lived. Eating healthy is a frugal practice because you are maintaining the only body you will ever inhabit and I am here to tell you, it is Extremely Important. After all, medical bills can wipe out a savings in a matter of weeks. When I began to really hit the Frugality Trail in 2007, I ate carbs (because they’re cheaper than fruits, vegetables and protein.) I lost about 15 pounds without even trying, but I think it may have compromised my health. Please don’t live like that. You can eat quite well and still be thrifty, just pay attention to grocery store ads and get creative. Salads with interesting vegetables, meats that are lean or combinations of beans, grains, etc. to create complete proteins are so delicious and Soooo good for you. Your body will thank you and it may possibly stave off cravings because you will be ingesting what you really need. It’s a $win-win:) in the Big Picture.
I think that one basic reason to be frugal is because ya just don’t have the money. I have seen people throw away so much. And the children that have been taught to throw everything away many times don’t have even a house to live in, they are so poor, Plus the attitude that some one is getting paid so they don’t have to clean around themselves makes me worry for our future on this earth. I myself grew up very poor, and am currently surviving from the past housing bubble, we find ourselves needing to cut the corners. My mother was part of the depression and passed many basic skills down. American society feels that it is their due justice to be able to squander valuable earths resources. It is easy to distinguish the difference between poverty an OCD. Children have had to wash those ziplock bags to help out when parents need more food to feed hungry mouths.
Money is great… love of money not so much. Enjoy money by managing it better means impulse control. Do I want it or really need it? We were all better money managers when everyone has less of it and respect for spending was watched eagle eyed. To stretch those dollars. Respect for the stuff we did own increased too because replacing it quickly was just not an option. Great blog! Thank you!